Ban The Man?

The latest news about atrocities against women has gained quite a bit of momentum. The incident happened in Hyderabad and in a hostel no less. And that’s why the decisions taken by the university management really goaded me to write; since I was a boarder in a hostel when I was at a University.

Apparently the girl students will no longer be allowed to go to the mens’ hostel. Ponder on that for a minute. How is what even remotely a solution? Why bar the female students when there were 2 different groups involved? How is prohibiting women entry of some place, a place which they really can avoid without inconveniencing themselves I agree; without applying the same logic to the men?

Because all throughout, in the name of keeping women safe, a section of women have had their movements restricted while the men have not had any such rules enforced on them at all.

In my hostel we had to head back in no matter how important the work was, the minute it was 10 pm. The boys had no such rules. Or even if they did, no one made sure that it stuck.

So while the girls had to get into a pattern of lifestyle that got cut short at 10 pm the boys roamed free and am sure a lot of them didn’t do things which would have been considered appropriate.

So if a male is inclined to be antisocial, abusive and have any criminal tendencies or inclinations; many of the rules just close off one door for him to indulge his vices while opening another convenient one instead!

What would have been so bad to ensure the deadlines or curfews were applied fairly to both the sexes? Isn’t it about time that the same lakshman rekha that’s drawn out for women be applied to the men as well? Not to get them to empathize but to let them know there are boundaries that can’t be crossed? That is to say if their feeble minds didn’t already clue them into that fact. But having the same rules made applicable does bring in some sense of conformity, identification and can build an adherence in time. The current method’s flaws are there for the whole world to see and judge.

My experience has always been this- more people do stupid things the moment it becomes forbidden (and therefore tantalizing) rather than if it’s not a temptation at all. What isn’t forbidden has little charm because it can be accessed, indulged in at any time and therefore less attractive. If the girls from my hostel had been given the liberty to stay out a bit late and do a movie AND dinner in the same evening whether they were dating someone or just with friends; less girls would have been tempted to go out during broad daylight and do the nasty with totally unsuitable people just because the waves of temptation.

Of course this isn’t to say that an individual still won’t exercise the wrong judgement even when all sorts of liberties are given to them. However, when making rules, it makes no bloody sense of have them applicable for one segment of society and not for the other. It’s Animal Farm all over again albeit with differences.

And getting back to the alleged crime in question- I know people have to take chances and meet people, do things that they like and not become prey to mass hysteria and paranoia but for God’s sake women….THINK! We are living in times when it doesn’t take even the most decent-appearing individual to do a volte face and that too to the tune of a crime or anything heinous. Grab yourselves a safe spot and learn to look after yourselves a little bit better.

Don’t turn into victims but be forewarned. There is too much going on around you to think you’ll be exempted from the shit. Most women have a spidersense that kicks in…don’t block yours out because it’s fashionable to do so or because it seems out of place. One day it won’t be.



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