Categories
blurt outs current events entertainment family fresh hits funny ha-ha good times home how in the world in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Life looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child music parenting people raising kids self-awareness self-improvement un-norm what kids want what women want WTF yeah baby!

Lost In Translation#248

TO had a good time dancing to Shaitaan Ka Saala on New Year’s eve but didn’t know the name of the song. His Hindi being what it is, half the words just escape him entirely! And when he does utter them, they are so far from where they started out that it’s more of a #dafuq moment than a #LOL one.

He asked me for the name of the song so he could tell Alexa to play it. And this is what happened…

TO-“Alexaaa wake up”. Alexa- I am awake. What can I do for you? TO-” Alexa play Sankranti Masala“. Alexa- goes round and round till she gives up the ghost and begins to reboot!!

Hooman-1. Gadget- still rebooting.

Categories
Blast from the past blurt outs challenges cognitive dissonance current events cynical family funny ha-ha home how in the world in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Learning Life life's lessons looped matter of fact me-time MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting raising kids relationships SAHM self-awareness the human mind turbulence what kids want what women want WTF

School Holiday Bloglet

There comes a time in every parent’s life (mainly the mothers) where they realise that their child is more like a cartoon character than they previously realized. It’s not always a happy realization. Imagine telling yourself, “Crap. I gave birth to Woody Woodpecker.”

Categories
blurt outs challenges changing society cognitive dissonance contentment current events entertainment family fresh hits funny ha-ha good times happiness how in the world in this day and age Indulgence Life life's lessons looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting people raising kids Red relationships SAHM self-awareness self-improvement the human mind turbulence un-norm what kids want what women want WTF yeah baby!

2020

The year started on a fun enough note. Had plenty of adored people around. There was music. There was dancing. There were hyper kids. Loads of alcohol flowing as well. And lights flashing…the whole shebang!

And then we crashed, bleary-eyed, into bed only to be woken up at what seemed like an ungodly hour but it was actually well past the crack of dawn. Bang into the new year I realized what a smartass a 10 year old can be.

I have…sigh…had a rather favorite coffee mug that’d been a part of my everyday routine for more than 6 years. It was nothing fancy. Just a bright yellow mug with Homer Simpson’s face on it, full of his usual goofiness. I’d bought it during my first ‘mom’s weekend away’ trip with the bestie and it was intended for Red. I don’t remember how it became mine, but it did. So the mug broke fairly early in the morning although after I’d bonded with it for what turned out to be the last time and I was more than a “bit miffed”. He-who-shall-not-be-named had butterfingers as usual and had broken the mug just near his feet while not having any slippers on (as usual). Shards were everywhere and Homer was irreparably broken.

After having realized there were no more storms to come, TO saw me sweeping up the broken pieces and looking sad while doing so. In expressing solidarity with his “favorite mother” he stood in attention, clicked his heels together, saluted and hummed a mournful tune. I have never been more caught between looking stern and controlling my laughter at the same time. Laughter won out. Kids..whaddya gonna do!

Speaking of…guess what the kid who kept whining during most of the train journey to my hometown say when I asked him to shush for what must have been the n(nth)th time? ” Oh! so uptight!!” I’m fairly sure I goggled at him while he cackled and ran away like the sprite that he is.

I’m not setting too many goals this year barring one- minimalism. Wherever possible. Wherever…and of course targets will be set to travel more, read more, do new things and make more good memories.

May 2020 find you all in more states of contentment and as little tumult as possible.

Cheers!

Image result for sarcastic new year memes"
image courtesy: gadgetfreeks.com
Categories
current events entertainment family fresh hits funny ha-ha good times happiness hollywood in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Life life's lessons looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child movie recos movie reviews movies people raising kids SAHM self-improvement telling stories what kids want what women want yeah baby!

Movie Review: Spies In Disguise

TO and I started 2020’s fun segment off with a mother&son movie date. That nachos and cheese popcorn were a part of it goes without saying. And that the dust from the nachos and the cheese from the popcorn don’t go without a hard scrubbing; goes without saying also.

Now, onto the movie! A lone wolf master spy and a lonely young brainiac scientist learn about each other and what it takes to be a team in this new offering from Blue Sky Studios. Will Smith is smooth as ever as Lance Sterling, the uber cool, unflappable, repartee-trading spy who always ‘flies solo’. Tom Holland with his vulnerable ‘young man’ voice as Walter Beckett come together and learn what it means to be friends, save the world and why pigeons are rather misunderstood and far more cooler than any of us every imagined.

It’s a fun movie with the kind of appeal fun that works with both the kids and the big kids in their lives. Check it out for the slick animation or if you simply like Will Smith…or pigeons! because this flick sends messages without being preachy, too uppity or without being too in your face about it. No spoilers here barring that there are LOTS of pigeons.

Rating: 3***

 

Categories
blurt outs book recos challenges cognitive dissonance cynical entertainment family fresh hits funny ha-ha health home how in the world in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Learning Life life's lessons looped Love matter of fact modern families musing parenting people raising kids rants relationships self-awareness self-improvement the human mind turbulence un-norm what kids want what women want WTF yeah baby!

Fowl Language Redux

Brian Gordon…redefining the reasons we sometimes want to flip our kids off!

Note: all images are sourced from the book Fowl Language: Winging It: The Art of Imperfect Parenting by Brian Gordon.

screenshot_20191221-071555_amazon kindle6065046432485463546..jpg

screenshot_20191221-070806_amazon kindle7668622217466482668..jpg
screenshot_20191221-072203_amazon kindle955683815647852535..jpg

screenshot_20191221-072338_amazon kindle8682181695633544781..jpg

screenshot_20191221-071650_amazon-kindle1360356112515171208..jpg

screenshot_20191221-072150_amazon kindle1379530855115929964..jpg

screenshot_20191221-080937_amazon-kindle1985329705046948427..jpg

screenshot_20191221-080719_amazon-kindle8539232512425733220..jpg

screenshot_20191221-081231_amazon-kindle2604508389078821118..jpg

Categories
Blast from the past blurt outs challenges cognitive dissonance family funny ha-ha how in the world in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Learning Life life's lessons looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting people raising kids rants SAHM the human mind turbulence what kids want what women want WTF yeah baby!

Antsy Pantsy

Some people have trouble being cooped up. Even if it isn’t in a tiny space and even if they don’t suffer from claustrophobia.

Take my kid for example…sitting still is a challenge. He’d rather be running his mouth and legs off all at once and flit between shadowing bowling, getting jiggy with it and talking his distracted head off.

We’re on a train right now and off to visit my folks for the holidays and am wondering why we didn’t splurge on flight tickets instead. Spending time with our children is seriously overrated at times.

We have a comfy cabin and everything but it’s not big enough to bounce hyperactive balls on, or take a running lead and pretend to bowl out a phantom batsman playing cricket among other things.

Seeing him go through stages of being slightly tolerable to obviously obnoxious, I was reminded of the days when I used to work and he was in kindergarten. His school transport would drop him off at my office and between me and my colleagues, someone would keep him busy while I got on calls or spoke to clients or sent out emails; often at the speed of light just to be able to wind up everything super quick and get him back home

One day I was on a fairly important call with a team we wanted to partner up with while offering our services and an-almost 4 year old decided that post going to the loo he no longer wanted to wear his pants and wanted to moon all the people I worked with instead.

The person I was talking to was droning on and on, not letting me get a word in edge-wise so I couldn’t hang up either and this is the scenario that played out: an irate and striving-to-appear professional woman chased a half-naked kid around her office and hissed at him sotto voce to put his pants back on immediately while uh-huhing with a guy who was tripping on his own voice.

Finally I think I bellowed to a kid who was on top of a kiddy ladder and about to bounce onto a foam mat to behave himself and put his pants back on or he was going to get spanked!

There was an immediate pin drop silence from the phone while a semi-naked little boy flew through the air, giggled his butt off and again ran off to do something else that would make the veins pop on his mother’s head.

The call was hastily wound up and a new time scheduled. The new call went by in a blink, we kept to the main points and even skipped the pleasantries entirely. The synergy took place, bumbums were covered up and the world was at peace again.

Till the next time. S-I-G-H

Categories
blurt outs challenges current events entertainment family fresh hits funny ha-ha home how in the world in this day and age Indulgence Learning Life life's lessons looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting people raising kids relationships SAHM self-awareness telling stories the human mind what kids want what women want WTF

Wonky Wednesdays

I admit, I should be caffeined up before doing anything pertaining to my child on weekday mornings. Actually that’s a good rule of thumb to follow all through now that I look back on the last 10 years.

Like every kid on a “winter” morning, he was snuggling deeper under the covers and refusing to get up, saying he couldn’t go to school because he was soooooo sleepy. That’s when my uncaffeinated, let’s also call it my lizard brain, decided I should open my mouth.

Instead of just yanking the covers off him or alternating between kissing him and pinching his butt, I chose to say (most unwisely), ” You shouldn’t have been walking around like a bhatakti aatma last night when you should have been in bed then, shouldn’t you?”

See, giving any sleep-addled person unfamiliar info that their brain needs to process first thing in the morning is just wrong. Especially in the case of a linguistically-challenged child who’s decided that he cannot process anything else barring English. So an unpronounceable word first thing in the morning was like dumping a whole world of WTFiveness on his drowsy head.

Our conversation went like this- TO: What’s a batati aatma? Me: BH-takti. TO: Bakati? Me: BH! TO: Butt-aakti? Me: BH-BH-BH!! TO: just gimme a hug Ayu and I’ll get up.

Now he tells me..

Categories
blurt outs challenges cognitive dissonance current events family fresh hits funny ha-ha home how in the world in this day and age Indulgence kids at play Learning Life life's lessons Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting people raising kids relationships SAHM self-awareness self-improvement the human mind turbulence what kids want what women want WTF yeah baby!

Sunday Morning Bloglet

Yesterday TO was in a bit of a defiant mood and decided to test the waters by flouting the rules and diktats laid out.

I did the only thing that I do when yelling isn’t an option; I stopped talking to him. It was quite a bit of a blessed silence for Red am sure.

The requests to read a book at bedtime fell on deaf ears amongst the litany of chants of my name. Finally a little boy fell asleep with a sulky moue.

This morning he woke up and gave me a hug and kiss and looked relieved when I responded in kind. It led to outpourings and declarations of love about me being his favorite mother!

I said I had to be his favorite mother because I was his only mother and he said, “That’s what you think. Ma (my mom) is my mother too! She’ll love me when you don’t!”

I dont think the lesson’s being learnt here, eh what?

Categories
blurt outs challenges current events fresh hits funny ha-ha how in the world in this day and age Indulgence Life life's lessons matter of fact musing people WTF

Typo Bloglet

Some mornings are just bloodthirsty and sadistic. Or maybe…it’s a not-so-smart smartphone?

Categories
blurt outs challenges current events family fresh hits funny ha-ha home how in the world in this day and age kids at play Life looped Love matter of fact MLM modern families mother and child musing parenting people raising kids Red SAHM the human mind what kids want what women want WTF

Turbulent Toosdays

We’ve been having slightly wonky weather here. It’s rainy and overcast one minute but suddenly bright rays of sunshine will burst through the clouds and blind us all.

TO has been slightly under the weather. His usual scheduled spell of cough-cold-almost-guaranteed throat infection during the monsoons is slightly delayed this year but it’s finally made an appearance.

He’s been home since Monday and my good cop’s taken a hike and left the bad cop on indefinite duty.

This morning after meeting our family physician, I told TO that he’s not really sick so he should get cracking with his chores and not spend the whole day whining about screentime.

The love of my life, flesh of my flesh did his chores…with aplomb! He made his bed by folding the bedcover in halves like a door. And he proclaimed it was a coffin. For ME.

I told Red that I’d need a lot of alcohol to get through today. Or maybe a Valium. It’s all the same when your kid prepares a coffin for you with glee and adoration.