Escape Into Fantasy- A Parenting Placebo

Every now and then I like to pretend. That things in my home are nearly picture perfect. When I sit down on the couch, or a chair I’m not likely to sit on a clothes pin that will jab me in the gluteus maximus. That I will have my coffee in peace, at length and savor each vitalizing sip.

That going to bathe will not mean the rescue of wild animals and divers from buckets before I can aim the shower jets at myself. Or that touching any random surface in the kitchen will not reveal a presence of stickiness which will either be jam or peanut butter.

The floors will be spotless instead of having tell-tale signs of a child who runs with his glasses of milk and juice in hand. The moment I put my foot on the floor when I get up in the middle of the night I’m not going be poked by a triceratops or land on a Hot Wheels car with God know whats stuck on its hood.

I also like to pretend that when my adorable, beautiful little boy wakes up in the morning it will be accompanied by a Good Morning rather than a sound that mimics the ambulance siren down to the last cringe-worthy pitch and tone.

The fantasy isn’t one of being single or not being a parent. Because that’s not entirely a desired state of being either. Once you have kids, you may not always be able to connect with that time in your life when they weren’t around. Brats or not…they’ve fit in seamlessly and that’s how it should be. But there’s such a calming effect to the fantasy ( aka delusion) that things are in their own place, the house is clean, all the little monsters that your little monster plays with are in their rightful place and if you want to, you can just NOT RUSH while you go about doing the prosaic little things that make up your life viz doing the laundry, taking in the laundry, hanging out the laundry, folding the laundry, making the beds, planning the meals, trying to recall if the wooden stuff needs another polish and if the leather stuff can go another week without its spray and polish….you know, all the little joys we embrace when we decide to be a home maker rather than climb up the corporate ladder in any shape or form.

But reality does set it. A small person comes back home, ecstatic to see you after a few hours of being away in school. And while you are the go-to person for turning on the t.v or sourcing the iPad and assuaging hunger, you are also the person they want with you when they are happy. You are the one they turn to.  For everything.

That’s a high that the best fantasy can’t begin to compare to on most days.

Image courtesy- canstockphoto.com/canstock16191715.jpg

Image courtesy- canstockphoto.com/canstock16191715.jpg

Happy Weekending People!

Pedicures and Percy Jackson

I’ve found my happy place and NO it’s NOT any place that doesn’t feature my kid! It’s getting a pedicure in a particular salon that has vibrating chairs that massage your head and back and have rainbow lights in the swirling foot bath where you soak your WEARY treads.

Why did they go the extra mile and add lights when people don’t always look down? Well because it’s pretty, silly!!

I like getting pedicures quite a bit. My feet are smallish so they are done with the exfoliating jazz pretty soon and spend more time massaging the chunky calves and soles till I feel lightheaded and quite cheery. Very soleful…excuse the pun.

Best thing about this procedure is that you have your hands free to read, text or blog, as I’m currently doing.
You don’t have to move your head this way and that while someone strips dead cells off your face or gets rid of the face fuzz that insists on taking root again and again!

The boy (since he barely looks out of his late teens) who tends to my feet usually clucks his disapproval in seeing feet he prefers seeing with some polish and soft skin, looking dowdy and not funky. He constantly tells me to moisturize and doesnt bat an eyelid when I end up taking two jazzy colors to alternate on my toenails, usually neon or just loud ones. He’s used to oddballs and their funny feet.

And now after having set me up with the colorful bubbly water and all the chisels he’ll need to get my feet human again, he sits diligently plodding away while I turn to the Heroes of Olympus-Mark of Athena.

Fridays sure turn out fabulous once in a while!

Happy Weekending 🙂

T.G.I.F

So it’s a Friday night. MLM conked off early with all the excitement generated due to both his grandfathers being under the same roof.

I had my dinner leisurely (YAY!), watched the last half of Jaws (YAYx2) and toyed with the idea of a drink and then opted to wait for Red to get home while I watched Criminal Minds.

Mundane?…Au contraire! There is such a thing as too much excitement. And excitement comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

While I wish from time to time that the option of going to a bar and doing shots was freely available or listening to live music on a slightly chilly roof top was part of the menu but occasionally the best thing to do is to really and truly be able to put your feet up and chew your food, reclaim the laptop for yourself, flip between channels and hear Roy Schneider say this!

Happy Weekend 🙂