Categories
challenges education family happiness home Indulgence Learning mother and child parenting raising kids SAHM what kids want what women want

Co-Sleeping…A Parent Reflects

One of the first things I bought when I got pregnant, was a cot for my baby. It was nice, smooth with rounded edges and had teething shields on both the rails. It worked well when the brat was a teeny-tiny infant and it also worked as a mini-prison of sorts during time outs when he started getting his bad-monkey groove on.

And one day he and I both slept off on my bed and after that there was no looking back. He wanted that big bed! He wanted that big bed to turn cartwheels in, to go up and down and round and round in and somewhere along the way he also slept there.

We’ve got him his own big boy bed in his own room and he has slept there on and off but it just took one bout of cold, cough or fever for him to end up in my bed and NEVER LEAVE!

But last night while we were having our usual story-time tussle (another blog post for later) before he slept off, I realized that each night when I reach out I can usually connect with one or the other of his limbs and unless it’s his butt which ending up near my face; it’s comforting to have him close by and I actually like it.

Right from the time he was born, he smelled ‘nice’. That smell that’s particular to babies which is a mixture of sweet, soft, baby powder, drool and cuteness. Add to that whatever lotion or powder you now smother your child in and you have a unique aroma that you associate with your child forever.

And while my night-time sleep is often punctuated by a bop on the head, sheets being tugged away entirely, hot breath right on my face and a knee to my sternum in the first hour of hitting the sack; it’s also quite lovely to have a soft, squishy bundle to well…softly squish.

Plenty of parenting manuals, how-to books advise against co-sleeping, I for one am beginning to think that our kids grow up too quickly as it is. One day they fit in your lap and then they don’t. They have the rest of their lives to sleep in different beds, holding onto different people. A few more nights of cuddles and elbows to ribs won’t hurt anyone.

And while I write this I know fully well I’ll be grumbling while I get the offspring into a “normal” sleeping posture from his usual one of the Vitruvian Man so I can make some space for myself at the near-edge of the bed.

Here’s wishing you all adequate space to sleep.

Good night.

Categories
entertainment good times home images Life nature Red SAHM self-awareness what women want

The Apartment Turns A Year Old

We will be completing a year in the new place or in the “new house” as MLM still calls it. He’s very clear it isn’t ‘home’ but the new house but I know it’s become home for us all.

I took the longest to settle in of the three of us. Red and the brat hit the ground running once we moved in but since the time that we decided to buy the place, get it ready to our specifications and finally move in, I guess I’ve spent the most time with the place.

I know in which room the tile is still a wee bit loose and makes a sound when you step on it, which room of the house gives you the best view of the world outside and how utterly fantastic it feels to walk in through the front door.

It’s not always about how much you labor towards something and then start to enjoy the result; it’s also about the things you feel when you start getting closer to the idea of you how wanted your own house or home to be. 

MANY years ago I was having dinner at the house of a couple who lived on a high-rise overlooking either the East or Hudson river; I forget which. Their apartment wasn’t all that great, it was a typical Manhattan apartment, compact, but it had an amazing view of the skyline and the river. The terrace was huge! You could’ve rebuilt half the apartment there!  Ever since that night when I was about 12 or so I’ve known how I wanted my home to look.

Fast forward to circa 2014 and we’re living a yuppie life with lots of trappings, fun, interesting new people who we’re getting to know better each time and the childish dream of a loft apartment keeps receding because the reality of this life is so, so, so much better.

And we get to see these guys when it rains…Peacocks on parade

2-IMG_0636

3-IMG_0639

Categories
challenges education Life parenting raising kids what women want

School Shopping

We’re shopping for a new school for MLM. He’s going to 1st grade in 2015 and we’re a bit worried. Correction- Red is a bit worried. Am anxious.  Anxious because when I was going to school at his age and even at an age older to what he is now, there was usually one or the other choice. And now there are choices galore! Ergo more and more chances to screw up his proper introduction to academia.

The more schools there are, the more parents turn up; kids in tow. The more parents turn up, the more schools pop up. It’s the strongest symbiotic relationship I’ve seen in a long, long while.

Each school promises to nurture your child while not over burdening or even mildly burdening them with any academics and letting them grow in a manner befitting their innate personality and the visions the founders of the schools have held true while establishing the school. HORSESHIT!

A school is a business. A business can be started on noble principles but nobility isn’t going to pay dividends long-term so you get with the program and start adding academic gloss via whatever seems to be trending. And while what might seem cynical the fact of the matter is that the methodologies we studied in weren’t bad at all. The people who implemented them might have been sub-standard but the syllabus wasn’t and we just need to take a look at our own achievements and where we are in life to be cognizant of the fact.

We end up obsessing about teacher-student ratios, ventilated-classrooms, AC in school buses, travelling time to school et al and all of these are valid points to ponder upon. But I don’t consider any of them a make or break thing barring the school distance in the case of a small child.

Here’s what I want for my kid-

  1. patient teachers who like to teach.
  2. a school that has enough open space to make the child feel GOOD about where they will be spending 80% of their childhood.
  3. an understanding of a child’s learning styles so the academics can be pitched accordingly.
  4. a capable administrator as the head of the school who doesn’t just look at numbers but also wants the kids in the school to actually KNOW and UNDERSTAND what’s being taught.
  5. a decent ratio of classroom vs. outdoor activities.

No school will be able to influence or enhance a person’s native intellect. It is what it is. But if they make a child happy, especially a small child, the kind of commitment towards learning they will get is nothing short of phenomenal!

Fingers crossed this particular bit of shopping around doesn’t entail any returns.

Lordy…tough times ahead.

Image courtesy- http://daytrippingmom.com/