The Universe Strikes Back

If you believe in karma that is. Else you can just believe in bad luck or stoically soldier through life’s tough spots. A specific group of people across the world, who are strangers to each other but actually united in their erm…”difficulties” are the parents to preschoolers. I believe they cease to be group members when the child turns 6 and then come together again during the teenage years.

Anyhow, during one of my imploding moments (a have a few throughout the week) I was trying to understand, WHY ME? And I realized that the only answer that made sense was that the universe was screwing with me. Why else would I be doubly blessed with a hybrid of a monkey and a parrot for a child?

From the spilt chocolate milk to the clothes he dumped into the washing machine (without separating the colored from the whites) just to help me out or the bodywash he emptied by putting it in his tub to make MORE BUBBLES (in his words)…it all seems like the cosmos conspiring against me time and again.

But I have news for you universe…he’ll eventually move out and I’ll retire from active parenting and become gaga (with happiness or old age is yet to be determined) and then he’ll be your problem!

What goes around. Comes around.

Author’s Note: This blog post was written as a means of blowing of tension which normally would have been accomplished with an alcoholic beverage and vocabulary normally frowned upon by childhood experts and shrinks (and my husband). But I still do blame the universe.

Mens Vs. Women: The Eternal Conundrum

OK people, be prepared for an out and out rant today. There’s a global phenomenon that men laugh and also mutter oaths about- The Woman Driver. The way this paragon of road (un)worthiness is portrayed you’d think she was a combination of a sloth or a slug who was inching forward in traffic while other people were aging in the process, or she was a hurricane on wheels; blowing away everyone in her path and piling up a huge body count in the process.

Now the question demands to be asked- Why am I ranting this fine, breezy morning instead of celebrating my rare and soon-to-be finished hours of me-time? Well I met the other half of the paragon viz The Male Driver.

While dropping MLM to school this morning I came across some beautiful examples of flagrant disregard for traffic rules, human and animal life to boot! And it’s not merely the speed demons on bikes or the vans bearing goods that indulged in such displays…it was nothing less than a Beemer…so you see, we have classy people getting into the act as well!

I have sadly come across too many people who sneer at women drivers, my husband unfortunately falls into these ranks despite him knowing better and ideally fearing for his life. But I fail to understand why a man’s gender isn’t singled out when he makes driving booboos. Do we women possess some kind of mutated driving chromosomes which make us “inept” or unsavvy drivers?

If we’re pointing fingers lets do it collectively at a group of incompetent or rash drivers overall. Why drag the gender bit into it? Because let’s face it, there are WAY many more males driving globally and getting into 7-car pile-ups or even ending up on car chases with cops than females from the look of it. So either those people are all cross-dressing men or maybe men too come into their fair share of driving ┬áno-nos.

As for the argument of men being from Mars and women from Venus- just remember that in the end we’re all aliens under the same sun!

Here endeth the lesson.

image courtesy-http://forums.heroesofnewerth.com/

image courtesy-http://forums.heroesofnewerth.com/