I came across an article in this morning’s Times of India’s Sunday section- Did Hermione choose the wrong partner?

The article by itself has little to do with being in toto about Harry Potter but more about compatibility and similarities in couples or could-have, should-have, would-have been couples and the choices that they ultimately end up making.

In a country like India where alliances are usually fixed taking into account similarity of background, family finances, religion et al, people can still end up being very different from each other temperamentally. The commonalities are usually in place to help the newly weds and their immediate families adjust (in theory). The more similarities you find in getting to know each other, the ice breaking goes that much better and there’s less new ground to cover or less surprises I guess.

For the multitude of people who end up choosing their own partners (from diverse AND similar backgrounds); they are propelled by a lot of reasons, emotional and practical, but I believe that we take the step into matrimony/long-term relationships because being with a particular person seems to be the right thing to do at a particular juncture.

Sure, people talk about being able to envision a life time with whom they love and picket fences, or condos in a high-rise, but getting through the day-to-day is what’s real and what’s palpable therefore does end up guiding our steps more than we realize. Because what you think of the future is merely a projection of your hopes, dreams and wishes drawn out of what’s transpiring in the present.

I have seen people who I never thought would actually fit each other personality-wise or those who would never seek each other out, get together and manage to hack it over the years. And even if a relationship doesn’t last until death do them apart, for some having had companionship, affection, support, passion, laughter in their lives is often counted as a success too.

Bottom line? I believe that when people choose a partner, they go by what makes sense to them emotionally and practically at a particular time.  It’s circumstances which play a huge role in defining whom we deem fit, deem right or even essential to partner with in life. So…did Hermione choose the wrong partner? Well had she chosen Neville or even Draco it’d have been a series of jaws-dropping across the globe but she chose Ron for reasons known to her and J.K Rowling alone. And in some parallel universe where fictional characters exist long after the books have been written, read and put away, am sure she and Ron are going through their daily dance or skirmishes as a married couple.

Did you choose correctly? That answer can get refined over time. If it makes sense now…run with it. Life has many surprises up her sleeve and you don’t need all the answers right away 🙂

2 thoughts on “Whom To Marry: Sense Vs Sensibility

  1. My hubby and I are very different but we compliment each other well. I did choose correctly then and I make the same choice now. Marriage is also a working relationship that we choose to commit to everyday. Things to change between couples but if we are lucky, those changes are ones we can live with.

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