Black Friday

I’m thinking of carrying out research on why supermarkets cause or trigger tantrums in children.
Rolling in aisles, causing a traffic jam for other shoppers, causing everyone to stop in their tracks to see WHO or WHAT is making that kind of sound.

I’ve often thought it was INCREDIBLE the amount of anguish a child can inject in their voice while crying over the silliest of things.

Initially I used to be appalled at such a sight thinking MLM’s rolling on aisles which have been tread upon by God knows who et al; but now I know it washes off. If not today then tomorrow. It took me a week to get his subway line-like scribbles with permanent marker off his leg. BOTH his legs actually. So am good with washing. It’s just a pity I can’t put him in the washing machine for the Extra Soak cycle. The tub’s too damn small…he’d need his bath toys for one thing and they all wouldn’t fit well.

So unless I have to do anything very urgently I usually let him cry it off and kind of cordon off the area around him so his flailing legs don’t knock over things from shelves or end up hitting some non-child loving person.

I no longer try to pick him up during tantrums…nothing more dangerous and nerve wracking. Far from perceiving it as comfort, the child thinks you’re putting an end to their civil disobedience and scream and kick with renewed efforts. Also that’s their outlet…better let them have their carpe diem.moment rather than having them seize anything else later on.

So there I was..experiencing my very own Black Friday in between the cereal and toy aisles and there were the usual suspects walking by- horrified looking young married couples- (yup! just look at me as the Ghost of Thanksgiving Future!) no doubt adding more boxes of contraceptives to their purchases; the young’uns out for a nice Friday night after work who just breezed past-nothing on their horizons except after-work drinks and hooking up; sympathetic or smug mothers ( depending on the frequency of their child doing thing); and finally the salespeople of the supermarket who were giving me looks that clearly said, ” BUY THE KID THE DAMN THING AND GO ALREADY! YOU LOOK LIKE YOU DON’T MISS ANY MEALS SO STOP BEING STINGY ABOUT THE KID’S TOY LADY!!”

And so I gave in…because urging from a far more critical source had registered and I simply couldn’t ignore that! Yup…your bladder makes a very convincing argument 😦

So we got home, went managed to go out for a rare dinner with the Lord&Master and came back with minimal fuss.

So yeah…I’ll be researching away on my dissertation titled- Supermarkets: The Bermuda Triangle of Parenting ( The disappearance of normalcy and obedience in a formally fairly ok child and mysterious appearance of behavioral aspects that instigates paddling the Gluteus Maximus).

Once this one has won be the Nobel Prize for Science I intend to begin work on my 2nd dissertation titled: The Direct Correlation Between Tear Ducts and Toys.

Ole!